by Christine on March 30th, 2012
Hi everyone! Sorry I’ve been a bit AWOL lately. I’ve been just enjoying life, doing the same-ol same-ol. I kind of feel like a broken record sometimes with the weight loss tips and updates on my life. Still, I hate to neglect my blog entirely, so I’ll give a few updates now!
I received a comment from my blog a few weeks ago mentioning that I never updated how my port-reattachment surgery went. Well, it went very well! My healing time was much quicker than the original banding surgery. Within a week I was feeling as good as new. They used previous incision areas to access the port, so I don’t have any more scars than I had before. The port is still attached, 8 months later, with no problems to report. Can you see the port through the skin? Not really. I have some droopy stomach skin from the weight loss, so that pretty much obscures the port. That being said, you can feel it really easily through the skin, even through the clothes. I hardly notice it anymore; you just get used to it. Overall, I’m pleased with my decision to re-attach the port in the same place. (And, for the record, my surgeon over at Ellis Bariatric once again did a fabulous job!)
Weight & More NSVs!
My weight is fluctuating a little bit more than I would like; today I was at 131.0, which is six pounds above my “goal weight” and just barely outside of my “maintenance range.” Now that it’s getting warmer I will exercise more, which will help. My eating still fluctuates between crappy eating and healthy eating.
My goal FOREVER has been that if I reached my goal weight, I would get a navel (belly button) ring. When I reached my goal weight, I didn’t get the navel ring because I was self-conscious about the saggy skin. Well, I finally did it! I got the navel ring! Sure, I still have the saggy skin and it’s not like I’m going to be walking around with a crop top or anything like that. But *I* know it’s there, and it’s a wonderful, constant reminder of what I achieved. Hooray!
Another NSV: As I’m getting more confident in my own skin, I’m meeting more people, making more friends, and getting hit on a lot more. I get hit on regularly these days, and it’s such a great ego boost! The other day I was out dancing with some girlfriends and some (quasi-creepy) dude bought our drinks all night long just for the chance to chat with me! What a compliment! Believe me, this stuff does not happen at all when you’re overweight.
Another NSV: I got my first tattoo!! I never would have considered it 3 years ago, when I was at my heaviest or with the low self esteem that I was suffering from. I don’t consider a tattoo in any way related to my weight loss per se, but it’s another confidence-builder and a reminder of how far I’ve come mentally and emotionally in the last three years! I am not really a fan of tattoos. Oh, I mean, I like them on other people, but I’ve never really cared to get one for myself. However, I really liked the idea of getting one at this time because it’s a reminder to myself to Stop Taking Myself So Fucking Seriously All The Time. It’s just skin. It’s just a tattoo. Life will not come to a crashing halt if you get one. I haven’t been fired from my job. And you know what? I rather like it, actually!
A weight loss challenge???
I signed up for a motorcycle rider class. I’ve always wanted to ride a motorcycle, and so I decided to take the plunge and get my license! The class is over Memorial Day Weekend. During that time I will get to actually sit on a motorcycle and ride it around and determine whether I am comfortable on a bike or, more importantly, whether I am strong enough to be able to ride it. I’m worried that, having lost so much weight, that the bike will overpower me and I will not be able to hold it up or maneuver it properly. A strange weight-loss challenge!! (Which will be answered in May.) I can’t wait though! Another dream on my life’s “Bucket List” that I can check off!
I’ve started to see a counselor recently. The jury is still out whether it’ll be helpful to me in the long-term or not, but he’s an interesting guy, and I’m interested in his “process,” so I’m sticking with it. I have all kinds of things that I want to work with him about, and among those topics are my distorted relationship with food (who knew? Fucked up food relationships don’t just disappear after surgery. Gasp!), my ongoing struggles with body image and self esteem, and also friendship and relationship changes since losing 100 pounds.
If you are going to be going through any life-changing weight loss surgery Dear Reader, I really encourage you to sign up with a counselor to discuss these topics in an ongoing manner, rather than waiting for any of them to become “issues.” I am more and more convinced that they are common topics that most weight-loss surgery patients go through, and dealing with it from the onset of the surgery, rather than later. Surgery and counseling really should go hand-in-hand. (Just my opinion.)
Again, I don’t know that I’ve seen any “results” or have “solved all my problems,” but it’s been helpful to at least attempt to articulate with some of these problems are and to begin problem-solve with an impartial bystander.
P.S. Today is my birthday, and I’m hoping to celebrate by spending time with friends and loved ones rather than with cake, food, and other unhealthy things. HOORAY!