A case of the headcase.

by Christine on May 17th, 2011

filed under Christine's Life Updates, General Information

Today I was browsing through some three-year-old journal posts (for those of you that don’t know, I have an online forum here if you’re interested in joining) and came across this lovely “before” picture. This is about three years old now.

Look at that sad little fatty face of mine! And I remember that pink shirt, too. I liked it so much. It was a 1XL and it was tight on me. I also remember when I could finally throw that one in the “too big” bin.  Here’s another picture, more recent, this time wearing a Size 2 dress. What a difference with my chin! Oh, that laser eye surgery sure made a difference, too.

A case of the headcase

One thing that struck me as I was re-reading my old posts is that…well, I frequently suffer from a case of being a headcase. I have a tendency to over-exaggerate problems, create problems based on getting stressed out and worse-case-scenario-fearing, which just leads to more stress and fear, which leads to more stress and fear…

It’s a really rotten cycle. And I have no doubt that it has an impact on my weight, relationship with food, not to mention my mental health.

I’ve been in a real headcase cycle lately, and it is well past time to snap out of that. Instead of fearing the worst, I’m going to celebrate all the good things in life that exist CURRENTLY. Instead of exaggerating problems I’ll think of solutions. Instead of lamenting past problems, I will look to a bright and happy future. Starting now.

Do you ever work yourself into a headcase tizzy? How do you get yourself out of it?

How my eating has changed!

A review of my old posts were interesting from a food point of view now, too. Before, three years ago, when I was gaining weight at a rate of 5-10 pounds per week, I would:

  • Starve or have limited calories (500, say) one day, and have a lot of calories (2200, say) the next, for a wildly inconsistent eating pattern.
  • Drink a lot of alcohol. Every day, and perhaps 3-6 drinks a day.
  • Ate more carbs than I do now, which is quite a bit I suppose.
  • Ate a lot of healthy, full-of-vegetable meals.
  • I drank diet soda like it was water.

These days my eating could use improvement in terms of adding more healthy vegetables into my choices, but overall my new eating differs from my old eating because:

  • I eat a consistent amount of calories, every day, usually 800-1000 calories per day.
  • I still enjoy alcohol, but I drink a lot less apparently. Instead of 3-6 drinks every day, I might have 1-2 drinks, maybe 2 times a week. A drink a lot more beer now, too, as opposed to martinis.
  • I eat a lot fewer carbs because of my gastric band. I eat a lot more high-fat foods like fish, almonds, avocados, and even a limited amount of chocolate. However, I seriously limit my portion sizes with these high-fat foods.
  • I drink water like water, and drink diet soda as a special treat, maybe once per week.

I just thought the differences were interesting.

If Current Christine could meet Past Christine and share these differences with her….would it have helped Past Christine lose weight?  Could I have prevented the need for gastric banding surgery?

Honestly, I don’t know that I would want to change me. I’m so glad I had the surgery, and I’m so pleased for all it has done for me. I wouldn’t want to take that away from me, no matter what. Aside from marrying my husband and moving far, far away from home, getting the gastric band is one of the best things I ever did for myself.

What are the three best things you have ever done for yourself? If you could go back in time knowing what you know now, what would you tell your past self? Would you want to share your secrets with your past self and change the future?

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  • Drfattofit

    I think starting this blog is one of the best things I’ve ever done for myself. Exercising regularly of course as well. If I could go back in time, I would totally try to tell myself what I’ve learned, but I don’t know if I would have listened. I KNEW, but I wasn’t ready.

  • http://onmyweightohappiness.blogspot.com/ Sarah Williams

     What an amazing transformation!